The Critical Skill of Boundary Management

Boundary management is such an important – and often overlooked – part of life. A significant amount of the email feedback I receive from readers who are struggling has to do with boundary management problems. When people don’t practice effective boundary management skills, they often succumb to problems like these: Toxic family members repeatedly pushing…

Irrational Neutrality

Do you have any people in your life who, in the face of today’s many social storms, will say things like this? I just prefer to remain neutral. I like to see both sides. I’m not into hating people on either side. The media makes everything look bad. How does this land with you? Do…

Overcoming Phony Politeness

You may think of maintaining your boundaries as something you need to do to protect yourself, but practicing good boundary management for yourself can actually serve the people around you very well too. Your boundaries define what you’re willing to allow into your life. You decide the types of people you’ll associate with and to…

Appreciating Your Intelligence and Rationality

I just want to take a moment to express appreciation to you (and all of my readers) for your intelligence and rationality – and your open-heartedness as well – during these incredible shifts that we’re all living through. This has surely been a year of change – and can you believe we’re not even halfway…

Social Contracts

So we’re going through some upheaval now. I’ve seen lots of polarized opinions about what’s been happening with respect to the protests and riots, but most of what I’ve seen doesn’t resonate with me. I find it difficult to subscribe to other people’s meanings in this area. However, I found what Trevor Noah shared about…

Read Social Contracts by Steve Pavlina

Misaligned Relationships, Rejection, Guilt, and Betrayal

One of my readers recently asked: How do you stay connected to loved ones who aren’t on a journey of curiosity and growth? I’ll frame this more generally by addressing these question too: How do you maintain relationships with incompatible people who expect you to stay connected? How do you manage shifting relationships while on…

Read Misaligned Relationships, Rejection, Guilt, and Betrayal by Steve Pavlina

Being Too Quiet

When I was younger, I was conditioned to yield to authority. Go to school. Go to church. Obey the parents. One of the most common commands was: Be quiet. Hush. Pipe down. Silence is a virtue. Children should be seen and not heard. So I learned to stay quiet – about problems, about desires, about…

Read Being Too Quiet by Steve Pavlina